Man, I will do ANYTHING to get out of trouble!

We have a lot of birthdays in my family this month. The most important to me is, of course, Smushy’s birthday. Unfortunately for everyone else, I seem to forget about the rest. It’s not intentional and I do eventually remember. Usually when it’s too late to call. Because I have always had the most excellent timing. Most people don’t really care if I forget, but my step-mother is not one of those people. She gets Offended and Upset. And she makes it sound like she’s not really mad, but you know she is. She holds grudges and will never let you forget it. Ever ever ever.

So of course I forget her birthday until it’s too late to call and I forgot to buy a card and yes I do realize I am the worst daughter ever. I called her the next day and she acted like it was fine and I knew it wasn’t. Nothing I could do about it though except add in some toddler art with her card and hope that smoothes things over.

(Smooth is a weird word. And it’s not “smooths” like I think it should be, it’s “smoothes”, or so spell-check informs me.)

But I figured out the best way to get out of trouble with her. Granted, it’s a little difficult and time consuming, but it’s guaranteed to work. Call her after her birthday early in the morning and say:

Yeah, that should keep me off her bad list for a while.

(Due March 26)